Powered by  - Designed with the Hueman theme. Why would you want to become a Democrat now?” “Because I’d rather it was one of them that dies than one of us.”, 4. This joke may contain profanity. The next day the paperwork got worked out. A: Senator. Do you know a funny one liner? Absolutely hillarious political one-liners! 25 Really Funny Harry Potter Jokes One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Minnesota. As the politicians started losing their tempers, one of them sneered at the other: “Have you heard of Bob Froyd?” “No.” admitted the other. How did you come up with such a high figure?” The Chicago contractor whispers back, “$1000 for me, $1000 for you, and we hire the guy from Tennessee to fix the fence.” “Done!” replies the government official. Add your one liner to our site and see how good it is. 21. “No charge,” the barber replied. Dick Cheney walks into the Oval Office and sees The President whooping and hollering. 26. On his deathbed, a lifelong Republican supporter suddenly announced that he was switching to the Democrats. '” Obama laughed and said: “Don’t worry about it. Politics Humor Always. Funny Political Jokes Read More » ... Today's public figures can no longer write their own speeches or books, and there is some evidence that they can't read them either. What a contrast between their soporific speeches and these witty one-liners. Little Billy wanted $100 badly and prayed for two weeks but nothing happened. “Nothing at all, boss. Check out our political jokes selection for the very best in unique or custom, handmade pieces from our shops. If con is the opposite of pro, then is Congress the opposite of progress? Jokes4us.com - Jokes and More. Republicans & Democrats are like divorced parents who care more about getting the kids to hate the other one than they are their well-being. Apparently, as Best Man, I’m supposed to sing the Groom’s praises and talk about his good qualities. Q: Why did President Obama get two terms? "One week," he said. From best of Conan O’Brien’s jokes to most hilarious spoofs of Obama, these funny political jokes will not only make you laugh, but may also make you think. Bush says, “Well that’s all neat and fine, but he doesn’t know anything about shark fishing. Then share them with your friends. Q: Have you heard about McDonald’s new Obama Value Meal? When asked what her favorite gift was, she said, 'Donald Trump.'". “Yes.” another man answered. Q. After looking around, Kirk said: “Beam up, Scot. When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to God, USA, they decided to send it to President Bush. He tells his mother that he is sure she will be happier since he knows that his gay lifestyle has been very disturbing to her. A. Also includes some hilarious Coronavirus jokes. I asked Obama: “Why did you get a Nobel Prize?” He said: “I don’t know. Q: Why does Hillary want to have sex with Bill Clinton first thing in the morning? A priest, a politician, and a clown, walk into a bar. 17. There is no reason for the government to limit political speech. Get to the Point — Quick! Enjoy. 8370 3273. On a scale of North Korea to America, how free are you tonight? A: Because every black man gets a longer sentence. A liberal is just a … All in favor raise your hand. From best of Conan O’Brien’s jokes to most hilarious spoofs of Obama, these funny political jokes will not only make you laugh, but may also make you think. They offered $10,000 in severance pay for each inch of their body to be measured however they chose. Jokes4us.com - Jokes and More. None, they are too busy screwing the President. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100. Related Funny Political Links You May Enjoy: A: The magician returns your watch at the end of the performance. The Minnesota contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some … A few days after that, a Senator walked in for a haircut. Do not steal – the government does not like competitors. I don't approve of political jokes...I've seen too many of them get elected. “I shall sit down,' replied the cat, sitting down, 'but I shall enter an objection with regard to your last. And if they do make you think, we apologize: we know you don’t want to think. A … I was pleasantly surprised how funny politician jokes could be. When he brought it home, his wife asked him: “Where did you get this money, honey?” He answered: “If somebody asks, that’s the money your grandma left us.”, 11. I think we should get rid of democracy. On my arrival in the United States I was struck by the degree of ability among the governed and the lack of it among the governing. Joke Generators: Click Here for a random Pick Up Line; Click Here for a random Yo Mama Joke A few days later a police officer came in. Bill Clinton, George W. Bush, and George Washington are on a sinking ship. 5 out of 5 stars (1,180) $ 5.01. 13. America is a country which produces citizens who will cross the ocean to fight for democracy but won't cross the street to vote. joke bank -Political Jokes . One day, the pope was in from Italy and after a rough week of meeting archbishops and other religious figures, he decided to go see the Galveston shore in Texas. The first one makes fun of a negative attitude to political … These funny speech openers have been written for you as a guide. A: Order anything you like and the guy behind you has to pay for it. 16. Apr. 2. or As the boat sinks, George Washington heroically shouts: “Save the women!”, George W. Bush hysterically hollers: “Screw the women!”. The same one as between a retard and a mildly retarded imbecile. It’s two shots and a splash of water. 4. 20 Really Funny Grammar Jokes Check out these 27 Best Presidential Jokes we have found for you. Political Humor. A judge walks out of his chambers laughing his head off. Due to an issue with the union, they couldn’t swap the two until the next day, and the Pope had to spend the night in Hell, while Clinton spent the night in Heaven. One is from Chicago, another is from Tennessee, and the third is from Minnesota. In 2018, standup comedy is almost as inescapable as politics, and … We did our best to bring you only the best ones. What’s the difference between Bush and Obama? 77 Best Funny Love Quotes They would thank you. Related Funny Political Links You May Enjoy: Want more politically incorrect jokes? What is Lewinsky’s code name in the FBI? 6. See more ideas about political humor, political jokes, jokes. 120 Best Funny Pick Up Lines Liked these politically incorrect jokes? That's why putting a joke in a political speech is a luxury, and it is always a risk. Late Night Political Jokes. (Compare with a similar East German joke about Stasi.) in Political Jokes +281-74. “I’ve learned a lot from the experience, but now I’m glad I’m going to Heaven. See more ideas about church humor, jokes, christian humor. 25. All three go with a White House official to examine the fence. Blood and glass were everywhere. 45. See TOP 10 political one liners. A middle-aged farmer working on the field nearby saw the accident and decided to help: he dug a huge hole and buried all the politicians who were still alive. Two large collections of Best political jokes exist. 93. Q: How many politicians does it take to change a light bulb? There are some speeches elect jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. Politicians and diapers have one thing in common. 15 Best Fox News Jokes joke bank -Political Jokes . Political Humor. Submit A joke. After death, Obama tricks God into letting him to heaven. If these reasons aren't good enough for you, get it because we're insecure and need your approval. Following is our collection of funniest Political jokes.There are some political politics jokes no one knows (to tell your friends) and to make you laugh out loud.Take your time to read those puns and riddles where you ask a question with answers, or where the setup is the punchline. This joke may contain profanity. Red or blue, young or old, stay up to date on what's happening in DC, without taking it too seriously.
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