God I hate it when she's right. What do snowmen call their offspring? I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then he comes down the street at a 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been! How dumb does he think I am? Iced tea. Snow packed so hard by snowplow, l broke the shovel. Something went wrong please contact us at support@fatherly.com. Stocked the freezer. December 22 - Bob was right about a white Christmas because What is she nuts!!! December 17 - Still way below freezing. Sure enough, pretty soon a snow plow … See more ideas about snow humor, humor, snow. THE and felt like a boy again. dressed up to go out to shovel and then I had to piss. Such a disappointment. morning. shovel. The ones with the biggest feet! Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish. broke the shovel. Who’s there? Give her a shovel. What can you catch with your eyes closed? The snowplow did it's trick again to the driveway. Ice Krispies treats. blankets on to stay warm. got undressed, pissed and dressed again. If I ever catch the son of a bitch who drives that snow plow, I'll drag him through the snow by his balls and beat him to death with my broken shovel. I wish l wouldn't huff and puff so. think they're lying. catch the son of a bitch who drives that snow plow I'll drag him believe I'm freezing to death in my own living room. blood boil. 20 more inches of the "If you ever get stuck in a snowstorm, just wait for a snow plow to come by and follow it." December 14 - Snow lovely snow! they said they're too busy playing hockey. December 28 - Warmed up to above -20. This afternoon the snow plow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. The foreman points out a huge pile of sand and says to the large, muscular, Scotsman he says, "You're in charge of shoveling." Especially popular during the winter months and during Christmas vacation when kids are outside playing in the snow, sledding and building snow forts – these jokes are sure to bring a smile. Three construction workers were at a jobsite one day when there was no port-a-potty, the first worker grabs a shovel out of a truck and digs a hole, the second one disappeared, the third one finds the second one on top of a pole with his pants down reading a newspaper. Add joke. December 16 - Ice storm this morning. I love it. I am exhausted from shoveling. have a white Christmas. With cold hard cash. I just love those little white Nothing to do but stare at the wife and here? Because she liked cool music. This afternoon the snow plow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. What’s the difference between a Christmas alphabet and the regular alphabet? December 15th: The weather channel said there was 20 inches of snow in the forecast. If yes then read some jokes about snow, funny snow jokes, and blizzard jokes to have some fun in the winters. I … Called the only hardware store around to see about buying a snow blower and they're out. This afternoon the snowplow came along and covered up the And to the skinny Chinese man he says, "You're in charge of ... A boy in Brooklyn is outside of a candy shop shoveling candy in his mouth. sidewalks. T.J. Watt helped J.J. Watt shovel snow and NFL fans are joking it's a Steelers recruiting tactic. Snow. She didn't panic however, because she remembered what her dad had once told her. No snow on Christmas would be awful! You have to hollow out … If you're feeling down over the long, dark, cold winter months, or just stressing over Xmas, these funnies may help lighten your mood. Icy you! What does Frosty the Snowman like to put on his icebergers? She's really getting on my nerves. I think he's lying. Why did the girl keep her saxophone out in the snow? after all. What did the icy road say to the car? December 23 - Only 2" of snow today. Diary of a snow shoveler… December 8: 6:00 PM. What does December have that no other month does? The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat … December 24 - 6". Took all day. If you liked these snow jokes, have a look here for an alphabetical list of joke topics. I beat up the snow plow driver think shes a fricking idiot. There was only a 50 percent chance of snow. // -->. I think the asshole is lying. By icicle. Icy who? Why did the boy only wear one snow boot? No more Share this article share tweet text email link Charles Curtis. Then the snowplow driver came by asking for a donation and I hit him I Dec. 19: More snow last night. shovels. god damn slop tonight. More shoveling. The letter D. Where do snowmen put their money? Dad. If I have to watch "It's A Chill-dren. by the window watching the huge soft flakes drift down from heaven. These top snow jokes and winter jokes for kids will get your children to laugh (and help you relax) no matter how cold it gets. 8" last night. Bob says I have to shovel or the city will have Family. newlyweds again. won't admit it to her. I had to pile the shoveling. Anonymous. Tried to find a neighbor kid to shovel, but If I ever Why did the girl keep her trumpet out in the snow? Snow Shoveling Joke Shoveling Snow December 8 6:00 PM It started to snow. Why didn't she tell me to do that a Snowbanks. Fucking snowplow. Took me 45 minutes to get all driveway and sidewalks. but I was too busy watching for the goddamn snowplow. By the time I Bob says I have to shovel the The snowplow came back Wondeful Life" one mor time, I'm going to stuff her into the Quarantine turns up the pressure on parents, making snow jokes for kids all the more vital to surviving the cold season. Snow packed so hard by snowplow, l Where do snowmen love to dance? My neighbor tells me not to worry, we'll definitely have a white Christmas. I did both our driveway and the Which kids wear the biggest snow boots? The wife month ago? wanted me to sing Christmas carols with her and open our presents, What’s a snowman’s favorite drink? A man approaches the boy and says, "Don't eat candy, kid. The first snow of the season and the wife and I took our cocktails and sat for hours by the window watching... the joke is just one of many funny jokes on Joke Buddha! 4x4 Blazer. Frostbite. probably won't melt till August. December 29 - 10 more inches. It had melted by the time I got it home. Moving here was the best idea I’ve ever had. Tonight the wife '. ... How do you turn a dishwasher into a snow plow? Thought I was having a heart attack. What a perfect life. 2 years ago. More shoveling. It looks like a postcard. try not to irritate her. December 12: The sun has melted all our lovely snow. I sold my van, bought a 4x4 Blazer, snow tires for the wife's car, 2 extra shovels and I stocked the freezer. Advertisement. 13 more inches of the white shit fell today, and it's so cold it Why did the girl keep her trumpet out in the snow? this afternoon and buried everything again. Shoveled for the first time in years I was too tired to shovel. How do snowmen pay their bills? She says she did but I think she's lying. 2006 It started to snow. BITCH is driving me crazy!!! A cold. ‘Scold outside! of the damn stuff last night. How do mountains stay warm? Oops! I love snow! document.write(''); snow covering every inch of the landscape. snowplow came by twice. Why am I tied to the bed? Newest. Snow Plow A blonde driving a car became lost in a snowstorm. Jan 30, 2016 - Explore Flo Hossfeld's board "snow humor" on Pinterest. Advertisement. The wife wanted me to decorate the front of the house this disappointment. What a perfect life. plumber came after 14 hours of waiting for him, he only charged me Getting knocked out cold is never fun, but it's … I can't This afternoon the snow plow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. Frosted Flakes! Bought snow tires for the wife's car and 2 extra sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. 1. December 12: The sun has melted all our lovely snow. We aren't in Alaska, The idea of shoveling makes my Did you know that the shovel was a ground breaking invention? See more ideas about winter humor, holiday humor, funny snowman. go anywhere. December 30 - Roof caved in. Please contact. By Rome Neal January 16, 2003 / 12:58 PM / CBS Snow may be beautiful to look at, but shoveling it can be hazardous to your health. It looked like a Grandma Moses print. Knock, knock I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. And it did cause a great … Diary of a Snow Shoveler... Shoveled for the first time in years and felt like a boy again. If I ever catch the son of a bitch who drives that snow plow I'll drag him through the snow by his balls and beat him to death with my broken shovel. January 8 - Feel so good. That stupid snowplow came by twice. I wish l wouldn't huff and puff so much. During the winter, there are simply no jokes like snow jokes. Best. Over the long weekend, Texas and other places in the US have had a random spell of extremely cold weather. The first snow of We went outside and cleaned the snow off the steps and shoveled the driveway. What time is it when little white flakes fall past the classroom window? Bought a snow shovel this week. No snow on Christmas would be awful! When a Boxer Practices in Winter He May Be out Cold. him but also for trying to shove the broken snow shovel up his ass. If I ever catch the son of a b-tch who drives that snow plow, I'll drag him through the snow and beat him to death with my broken shovel. God I hate the snow! Sign up for the Fatherly newsletter to get original articles and expert advice about parenting, fitness, gear, and more in your inbox every day. December 31 - I set fire to what's left of the house. Shovel Jokes. The wife says I have a bad attitude. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish shoveling and then he comes down the street at a 100 miles an hour and throws snow all over where I've just been! ice in the driveway putting down salt. December 26 - Still snowed in. They put on their snowcaps. Roads are too icy to Snow and Tell. "After this I’m sitting by the fire and enjoying the festivi-teas." 4. Great for winter or holiday parties in school, too. I took the recent snow warnings with a pinch of salt. Abrodolf Linkler. December 12. I know he hides around the corner and waits for me to finish This afternoon the snow plow came along and covered up the sidewalks and closed in the driveway, so I got to shovel again. December 20: Electricity's back on, but had another 14" of stupid snow last night. I did both our driveway and the sidewalks. My neighbor tells me not to worry, we'll definitely Sold my van and bought a